Eye of the Tiger [Kogo's Yurt, D5, EA, Closed]

[Matsu Kogo]

She rears up, fire returning to her eyes. "That is true. You should have made your circumstances clear. I wish you knew your heart better Akil-san. It would make my life a great deal easier." She looks at his face and tries to keep her heart as stone, but she cannot succeed. Too soft, mother always said. A heart of clay.

"You are forgiven Shinjo-san. This miai means that we are all meeting so many individuals. Things are so confusing. I have not told you, but I am also being courted by three others. " Four if you count the Moto, but I don't. "One of them....has been kind and good to me. He would make an excellent husband. I suspect I would be content and likely happy with him. The others, I am still getting to know. I am unsure of their wishes and mine. " She looks down. "I just...I thought perhaps....Perhaps if you saw me, as I am in all ways. You would see my worth above the other. But it is not that simple for you, is it?" She looks at him, folding her right knee to her chest, an unconscious self protective gesture.

[Shinjo Akil]

"Life never quite is," he shook his head in response. "I see the worth of you both, and I find myself unable to simply push one on a pedestal, Kogo-sama." He considered his next words carefully. "The Ide have tried their best to prepare me, but ultimately there is much that I am still learning, and I am uncertain the process of this miai is truly helping facilitate..." there is a pause, as if he realizes he is at risk for rambling.

"The other Unicorn ARE good men. No matter which of us you end up with, I am certain you will be content." He considered his next words. "I... I am sorry I was not better."

[Matsu Kogo]

His words pierce her heart, as effective as the arrows the day before. Why will you not harden you cursed thing? He has admitted he does not love you more. Why do you stay so soft? She reaches out a hand, making a stopping motion. "Desist, Akil-san. I do not say these things to harm you. Intent may not matter in this case, but...." She looks at him directly, her eyes utterly clear. "I do not wish to be on a pedestal Shinjo-san. Pedestals are for statues. I will likely not be one. I wish to be your wife. But if I cannot be, know that I cannot be other than a friend. I cannot share the things you have asked of me, if you are pledged to another. It is not in me."

[Shinjo Akil]

He closed his eyes. Then I am to choose, whether through inaction or otherwise. He rose slowly as she spoke, looking at her with sad eyes. "I am sorry I cannot definitively say that I will be your husband, Kogo-san. I... am selfish to think that things would simply find a way to work out." He took a breath, not moving any further. "I do not know, yet. There are still five days left here before a decision needs to be made. Just know that no matter how it happens, I will always be honored to count you a friend, even if destiny determines that it is all I am to be." Fate is cruel indeed. But I would be unsurprised if Fukawa felt the same as Kogo... which only would make this even more difficult.

[Matsu Kogo]

She closes her eyes and rises with him, opening them as if to memorize his form. "She looks at him, the mask of her makeup shifting slightly with a tiny smile. "Well Akil-kun, if nothing else, I thank you. I have never understood the fire of my Matsu blood more. I just did not know that it would rage in love and not in battle. " She pauses, her eyes darting down. A sudden laugh bursts through her lips at a thought. She looks at him, her eyes a tinch wilder than usual. "My mother said this miai would be the making of me. I am not sure this is quite what she had in mind."

[Shinjo Akil]

He smiled a bit, if somewhat nervously. "I am glad that I could be of some assistance..."

[Matsu Kogo]

She looks down, unsure of herself all over again. It is easy to see that, despite passing her gempukku, this lioness is still shedding a bit of her cub self. " I am sorry my friend. I am sure your Crane love could flirt a fan and cover her mouth and tell you that she was not perturbed and smile while she said it. But I am not one as she. I can hide this no more than a lion can hide a thorn in its paw. " She takes a deep breath. "Our words will stay between us, til a time that comes when things shall be decided. And know that I bear you no ill will for being caught up in the same flame as I."

[Shinjo Akil]

"Thank you," he said slowly, considering each word. "Clearly I have no talent for disguising myself either," he offered with a bit of a smile. He moved towards the tent flap, considering it before turning to her and bowing, far lower than necessary for their station. "Thank you, Kogo-san, for being my friend, as undeserving of the honor as I am."

[Matsu Kogo]

She is slightly appalled and reaches down to grab his shoulders and haul him up. "No Akil-kun. Stop this. You do me too much honor, for screaming at you and hurling my feelings about, like a child having a tantrum." She pauses. "Had I been honest with you about myself and not doubted my worth so much, perhaps this would not have occurred. Who knows? All we have is this moment. And I will not see you bow to me like this."

[Shinjo Akil]

"And if I had been honest from the beginning, then I can say with certainty none of this would have occurred," he responded in kind, though he moved up as she moved him, a hand instinctively moving to grasp one of the ones now on his shoulder. "It's my fault for not thinking of you enough... thinking of how you might end up feeling."

[Matsu Kogo]

His touch feels almost as sharp as the brand from her gempukku, her skin is so sensitive. But she cannot seem to pull away. "At this very moment, I cannot bring myself to regret it. That may change." She reaches her other hand out to touch his face, gently, savoring this feeling and locking it away for safe keeping. "But know that no Matsu would seek to keep you chained or caged, standings be damned. If you were mine, you would be because you wished to be this Matsu's husband. Ask your Crane if she can say the same thing."

[Shinjo Akil]

His eyes closed as he considered the question. His hand reached for Kogo's face, touching her cheek gentle as can be. The only word he could find in me moment was "...Kogo..."

[Matsu Kogo]

Her eyes flutter shut at the touch, locking this all away inside of her. She opens her eyes slowly, taking him in. "Akil-kun, may I kiss you again?"

[Shinjo Akil]

Akil's eyes opened again, a smirk managing to back through his On. "It strikes me that a Matsu should not be asking for what she wants, but instead should just take it."

[Matsu Kogo]

Kogo thinks to herself for a moment. "There is something to that. And perhaps I might, if I was an ordinary Matsu." She smiles at him. "But I will not have you caged, Akil-kun. I will take nothing from you that you do not give. My fire burns for you, but I will not allow it to harm you. I give you my word."