Hurt (D11, EE, Yuki's)

[Usagi Tomoe]

(Continuing the trend of music-based titles)

Tomoe hoped that Yuki had recovered from the choosing earlier that morning. The poor girl had looked absolutely miserable as Hotaru made her choice, and the Hare felt it had been best to keep her distance and let Yuki have the chance to compose herself and push through.

The now betrothed Hare gently rapped on the flap of Yuki's yurt. "Yuki-san? It's Tomoe."

[Asako Yuki]

"Tomoe-san?" Came a voice from inside, a little bit of warmth was still left, though tragedy had robbed her of much of it. "Please, come in."

[Usagi Tomoe]

Pushing the flap aside, the small Hare stepped inside, leaving her On for the moment at the door as her eyes searched for the poor Phoenix woman with concern.

"... How are you?" the words were hardly the best ones, but it was the only ones she managed to say, considering she didn't even know where to start.

[Asako Yuki]

Yuki had stripped away her makeup long ago, the tears having ruined it. Even without makeup she was still pretty though.

"Ah, I..." She sighed. "I have been better, Tomoe-san." She admitted weakly, she looked up at Tomoe and it was apparent that her eyes were still puffy from tears. She managed a smile. "Congratulations on managing to get Iuchi-san. I hope you," Her voice cracked and she had to stop for a moment. "I hope you will be very happy together."

[Usagi Tomoe]

"Thank you, but... I'm sorry it did not go that way for you," she stepped closer, smiling sadly as she looked at the melancholic face of the pretty Asako. "Baatar is... he means well and won't treat you poorly. I hope you will find some happiness with him, even if it wasn't the one you wanted."

[Asako Yuki]

Yuki was quiet for a moment, looking past Tomoe. "I won't, though... How could I?" She sniffled a little. "Hotaru- no, Bayushi-san knew I favored Butaj, we had shared that information. She'd had no interest in Butaj before this." Her voice cracked. "There were so many others she could have had. Why did she take Butaj from me?"

[Usagi Tomoe]

Tomoe's lips pressed together, and she placed a hand on Yuki's shoulder. "I... was surprised she chose Butaj-san too, but... she doesn't seem like the spiteful kind. I don't think Hotaru-san did it to hurt you personally. Maybe she didn't want to say what she felt about him at first...?" the Hare sighed. "Feelings are a complicated thing."

[Asako Yuki]

"A samurai does not live by their words, but by their actions." Yuki responded. "It doesn't matter if she did not intent to harm me and Butaj. She did."

[Usagi Tomoe]

"And death is a feather. Duty is a mountain. By your actions, you have chosen Duty, have you not?" Tomoe raised an eyebrow. "Losing those you love hurt, trust me I know... but at least you can take solace in knowing that he is alive and well. There can still be ways for you to love eachother, Yuki-san."

Even if such love cannot last...

"This is why I said I did not want a love that is like lightning from the sky. It is sudden, it is magnificent and can seem beyond compare, but in its wake is often something hurt."

[Asako Yuki]

Yuki's face took on a new pained look at that. "Hai, but... There is nothing but ashes for me back home. I've told you of my family, I would return with a boy I do not know, with no purpose to my life again." Yuki choked up again and shook her head.

"I always wanted love like a fire, I do not want this pain to fade, because if it does, it means my love for Butaj has faded too."

[Usagi Tomoe]

Tomoe had for a moment forgotten that Yuki seemed to have had the worst sister in history. Right.

"Pain and love never fades... at least, in my experience, it does not, but we learn to live with it. But there is possibilities for you to pursue if you wish. The honorable one could be to retire from the life of a samurai." Poor Baatar. All caught up in this mess. "Protest the decision and become ronin is another."

She gave Yuki's shoulder a gentle squeeze before withdrawing her hand. "But, no matter what choice you make, there will be others who will be hurt. Just like lighting a candle casts a shadow, as my sensei would say, rarely do our actions come without consequences. Your happiness might come at the expense of someone else's, Yuki-san."

[Asako Yuki]

"I left without speaking to Moto Baatar-san. Not my finest hour." Yuki admitted glumly. "It is not his fault that Bayushi-san chose to spite Benten." She sighed. "I don't know..."

[Usagi Tomoe]

"You will have time to think of it in the coming days... it's not something you have to decide upon right now. Just," she paused a little, uncertain of what was Yuki's true temperament, "...don't seek revenge. It won't do anyone any good. Maybe that's the sentimentality of my sensei speaking, but revenge won't fix anything here."

"If anything, the fault should lie with those who decided that this would be made into a game of points, as if finding eggs or drinking poison would determine how one is suited to be someone's spouse. Would it have been so wrong to just let us make the decisions ourselves, as long as both parties were happy with the decision?"

[Asako Yuki]

Yuki shook her head. "No. I..." She sighed. "I admit that for a time I considered going to the shrine and smashing all of Bayushi-san's hard work but it is just not in my nature."

"Making the decision on who one will marry is a choice rarely given though, Tomoe-san." Yuki still had little light in her eyes as she spoke. "Though by the time it came to me, there was not much to choose from, between two men I knew nothing of." She looked back up at Tomoe. "Did you meet Moto Baatar during the Miai?"

[Usagi Tomoe]

There was some relief in her chest when Yuki did not seem the type to seek vengeance. It seemed so against the Asako's teachings, so she was glad to know that at least for now, it wasn't something in Yuki's nature.

"You have at least maintained the honor of your family, as you will not go home unwed." The Hare smiled a little bitterly as she thought of her kinswoman. Poor Tsukimi-chan...

"I have met Baatar a couple of times during the miai, as he would attend my history lessons. He... has certainly grown over the days. I thought him a bit rude and uncouth when I first met him, but I admit I also thought the same of Butaj," she gave Yuki a small playful wink at that. "But that he showed up time and time again, I guess it showed that he was at least very willing to learn. And his manners improved too over the days. When I saw him yesterday, he was making his best efforts to be kind and respectful towards those gathered for my lesson. So in him, I think you will find a husband that might be a little clumsy and unsure of himself at first, but he will work very hard to be a good man."